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Friday, November 12, 2010

Death By Orgasm Scorpion Vibe  

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When I noticed the collection of Death by Orgasm toys on Good Vibration's site I initially wanted the Vampire, but when I saw the Scorpion I forgot my love for all things Vampire and asked for one right away. I'm a Scorpio. I love Halloween and all sorts of other strange and wonderful things... how could I resist?

Not only does the Scorpion come with a fantastic 10 speed waterproof bullet, but it comes with the super stretchy elastomer Scorpion shaped sleeve.  With the coffin shaped tin packaging, this toy is perfect for anyone who loves dark or gothicy things!

The bullet is 2 1/4" long and about 3/4" wide and is powered by 3 watch batteries which are included. Inserting the bullet into the sleeve is a bit of a pain, but the sensations brought on by the Scorpions flickering tongue are well worth the trouble. The bullet can be put in any way you wish, but if you hold down the button for 3 seconds at any time it powers off and I found I did this less often with the button on the tail end. (I love not having to cycle through to turn it off!) The 10 speeds include 3 intensities of steady vibration along with 7 different patterns.

Now, I may just have a twisted imagination, but before using the Scorpion I was hoping I would be able to turn it on and watch it creep around powered by the vibrations on it's wiggly Scorpion legs. Unfortunately, the bullet leaves the Scorpions body rather rounded and comical in appearance... it also stops it from moving about when set down. While this vibrator won't fulfill any creepy crawling Scorpion fetishes, it is still pretty impressive for only $20.

The bullet is a PU coated non porous ABS plastic so clean up is easy with soap & water or sex toy cleaner as long as you make sure to have the battery compartment fully closed. It can be sanitized by wiping it down with alcohol or a 10% bleach solution. The sleeve is elastomer, so can be cleaned with the same method but can't be sanitized. Plastic & Elastomer are both hypoallergenic, phthalate and latex free.

I believe these were a special order for Halloween, and currently the Vampire and Scorpion are the only ones still in stock so if you would like one I would suggest buying before they are sold out if you don't want to wait until next Halloween!

Posted in , , , by Unknown

Saturday, November 6, 2010

Penis Bandz  

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So last night at work started out as a pretty quiet night. I seemed to be making good time and once the bar closed I had a few minutes to spare while I waited for all the customers to leave and headed off to use the washroom.

On entering, I heard the telltale shuffling of feet which gave off the fact that there wasn't one, but two people in the handicap stall. Then a mans chuckle followed by his voice I'm whacking off in the womens washroom!

Don't ask me why I chose the stall right fucking next to the Handicap, buy hey, I had to pee. I could make out the sounds of making out and heavy petting and thought I can handle that. As I picture the scene going on just inches from me my juices start flowing and I sit down, just in time for the pounding on the wall next to me to start.

How the hell am I supposed to pee with that going on?

I pulled my pants up so quick that I almost got my panties in a knot and banged on the wall. Hey buddy! You wanna buy a sex toy? They continued on as though they hadn't heard me, her moans now echoing through the bare walls of the washroom. My own loins now anxious to be caressed. Shit they are having sex against the wall, my ultimate favorite position.

Hey Buddy, do you need some Penis Bandz?!

With that, laughter rang out and all activity stopped. The door slowly opens and the ruggedy handsome man sheepishly comes out; disheveled black hair, white shirt untucked and black tie loosened, clean shaven. I'd like a turn in the stall now sir I think to myself, but then I snap back to reality. I work here, I need to be a cock block for the night.

Way to go man, Here are your Penis Bandz. Holding out the comical silicone bands. They are like Mardi Gras beads, only you earned them for daring to have sex in the womens washroom of a busy hotel! Laughter again, as the young woman in a gorgeous black mini dress and knee highs creeps out of the stall.

Awesome! Where can we get some more? They asked in sync. You can try the next hotel, I told them, Or you can head over to www.PenisBandz.com where you can buy them in a package of 12!

Afterwards, I of course had to spread the news to the other staff while giving out a round of Penis Bandz. The new security guard "enjoys my company" a little more than the rest of the staff, and pressed for more detail. Did it sound like he was good?

Well Sure, he was able to do her against the wall and thats fucking hot all by itself. Without skipping a beat the Security Guard calmly stated, That's nothing, I could hold you up without the wall. Give me a chance to earn those Penis Bandz.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



The above true story (with artistically altered details) is just one of the many ways you can have fun with your Penis Bandz. I received a few packages in order to do this review and I think they are hilarious! These penis bracelets are a must have for any adult party or random act of public exposure. (Think Bars, Colleges, Bachelorette Parties)

If you enjoyed my review, you should check out their equally hilarious FAQ!

Win it!
Six of you will win your own pack of 12 Penis Bandz!
Open Worldwide, Ends November 20th

How to Enter:
Check out the Penis Bandz website and leave me a comment telling me what you would do with your Penis Bandz?

Extra Entries:
Leave me a comment relevant to the above review.
Follow Penis Bandz on Twitter
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Check out the new @PenisBandz and enter to win a little dick from @MisfitMomma! http://dld.bz/5pMG The Giveaway ends November 20th

Feel free to change the tweets wording if you'd like, but please make sure to include the Twitter handles and link!

Posted in , , , , , , by Unknown

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Cherry Chip Boobie Cakes  

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My friend Nanny from Naughty Mommy asked me to write a guest post this week and it took me a while to think of what to say but since this cupcake pan was my project for the week I decided to tie it in with this post.

If you don't already read her blog, please head over and check out my first attempt with this pan and don't forget to check out the rest of her posts because she has some great erotica up as well as her own sex toy reviews!

Kevin from Pipedream Products had wanted to send me a cake pan for this review, but instead I chose this cupcake pan and let me tell you why. Every single time I make a full size cake, it falls apart. I usually have better luck with cupcakes, and if you checked out my post on Nanny's blog you will see that my first attempt with this pan didn't turn out much better but here's to trying again!

I'm no baking pro and I'm not even going to pretend to be but since this is a baking post post I wanted to share with you one of my favorite recipes. This is also one of the only things I bake from scratch! I would have made this for the review, but the kids ate all the banana's I was saving to use so that idea was out.

Banana Bread
  • 1/2 cup shortening
  • 1 cup sugar
  • 2 eggs
  • 3 mashed bananas
  • 2 cups flour
  • 1 tsp baking soda
  • 1/4 tsp salt
  • 1/2 cup cold black coffee
Mix it all together and bake it in a loaf pan at 350 for about an hour. You can also use a muffin pan. I usually double the recipe to make one loaf and12 muffins. Don't panic if you forget the flour. I did that once and it still turned out edible, but whatever you do - Don't forget the coffee!

Like I said, I didn't have any banana's so I went with cherry chip. It's made of all kinds of deliciousness and I just wanted a reason to eat it.

Since this is a review there are a few points I need to mention before you enjoy my horribly made video of me using the Boobie Cupcake Pan:

Packaging: Cellophane bag with tacky yet comical cardboard stapled on top.
Size: 9.5 x 8. Each set of Boobies is about 4" across, if you can avoid breaking them.
Clean up: Easy Peasy. The cakes broke, but they didn't stick. (I greased the pan before putting in the mix)


I should start a series. Misfit Cooking: How not to cook. My skills in that area are all kinds of fail. Luckily, I'm good in bed!

Posted in , , , , by Unknown

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Voluptuous Vampire Costume review  

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Well, I promised you guys a review and I did review the costume but I ended up publishing it on my other blog along with a more detailed version right on Eden Fantasy's.

I would love if you would check them out, but mostly the one on Eden Fantasy's. If you like my review, please vote on it too!

I know my reviews probably don't bring on the OMG-Best-Review-Ever reaction, but I do put a lot of work into each one and like getting feedback especially if there is something you think I can improve on!

Posted in , , , by Unknown

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Review: Medium Pop Plug  

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Another wishlist item fulfilled! Well, partially...I still need to get the small and the large but I'm very happy with the medium and will definitely be adding them to my collection. The packaging isn't anything special, but I did find it to be cute and tasteful. It could be used for storage if you wanted to, but the plug is so small that it is easier for me to just toss it in my drawer and rinse clean before using.

If you remember my review on the Anal Explorers, I had wished for a similar yet larger set and I think the Pop Plugs are a good next step. The white plugs in my photo which are sold at a different store are identical in style and size, but the Pop Plug seem to posses a higher quality which is probably why it is higher priced. Both have a visually noticeable seam all the way around, but the seam on the Pop Plug can't be felt as much as the seam on the white plugs can. The texture of the Pop Plug is also more velvety and overall is just much more desirable to me. In fact, I haven't even used the white ones yet because of this.


For the record, the Pop Plugs are made by Doc Johnson, and the white plugs are made by Orion.


The medium Pop Plug is 4" long and 1.1" at its widest. Only 2 1/4" of the length is insertable. The tip starts out very small and I was able to use this plug without using any other toys to work up to it, but if you think you need to start with something smaller I would personally recommend the Anal Explorers or you can check out the many Anal Starter Toys available from PinkCherry.ca. I love the stubby length of this plug since the length of anal toys is what has given me discomfort in the past.

I don't know if I would be brave enough to leave the house with the plug inserted, but I was able to walk around the house and sit down without any problems. The plug didn't try to pop out on it's own, but for the more advanced user it might. The base wasn't noticeable between my cheeks and the little handle wasn't noticeable through my jeans.


Pop Plugs are made out of a lovely smooth and velvety silicone which is much like the silicone that I liked with the Anal Explorers. Silicone is excellent for butt plugs because it's totally body safe being hypoallergenic, non-porous, phthalate and latex free. It is also very easy to clean and care for just by washing it in soap & water or sex toy cleaner and can also be shared & sterilized by bleaching, boiling, or running through the top rack of the dishwasher without detergent. Make sure to only use water based lube when you are playing with a silicone toy.

Unfortunately, PinkCherry.ca doesn't have the small or large Pop Plugs in stock but they do have plenty of other great sex toys to choose from and as a huge benefit to myself and my fellow Canadian readers - shipping from within Canada! US shoppers can check out PinkCherry.com.


PinkCherry Sex Toys

Posted in , , , by Unknown

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Review: Sailor Soft Pack  

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When my husband was away, one thing that I missed doing was rubbing his flaccid penis through his briefs. To solve this problem, I got myself a packing cock and found that feeling it through my pants excited me in more ways than one.

Rather than a completely flaccid penis, the Sailor Soft Pack from Good Vibrations feels more like a semi- erect penis since it has a firm -yet still flexible- core. It is available in three different shades to match your skin tone; caramel, coffee, and vanilla. It is also available in two different sizes, size 1 which 4" long and size 2 which is 5" long. This packing dildo is made from cyberskin to give it a realistic feel.

Mine arrived in a clamshell package without any insert so until I measured it I wasn't sure which size I had received. Turned out that mine is 4" long so it is size 1. The testicles are shaped so that they will cradle the shaft in order to help it dangle just so, and they are textured to add to the realism. The penis is lightly detailed with veins and a head.


I received the vanilla, and this color works really well for me. I have Mr Limpy, and find that it is way too pink but this one is quite close to my actual skin tone. I tried to wear the soft pack around in my Spareparts Joque harness, and it worked out just fine but the cyberskin did pick up a lot of lint from the black fabric on my harness. In the end I decided it was easier to just stuff it into my panties, but I hope to get another harness specifically to use for packing soon.

The Sailor Soft Pack is quite a bit bigger than my x-small Mr Limpy and if you are looking for a nice, firm bulge this packer will come through. I didn't find it to be awkward or overly noticeable, and it definitely looks real from a bit of a distance. The one thing that the Sailor Soft Pack is lacking in for me is in the detail. Mr Limpy has a much more prominent head, where the Sailor has more subtle detailing and I missed being able to make out the head through my pants while wearing this one. It's almost like Mr Limpy is circumcised and the Sailor is not. It would be hard for me to single out a favorite between the two, and I'm glad that I have both to choose from.

Cyberskin can be cleaned with soap & water, and then dusted with corn starch once dry to keep it from becoming sticky. You should also be careful when storing not to squish it or rest it on a textured or colored surface as it could permanently change it's shape or absorb dye from materials. Contact with other toys can also cause damage, so it is best to store in a plastic bag or the original packaging. If you should feel the need to use lubricant on this toy for some reason, make sure to only use one which is water based.

Posted in , , , , by Unknown

Monday, October 18, 2010

Guest Review: I Like it Doggie Style  

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This review was written by a friend of mine -Laura- who will be teaming up with me to post reviews here on my blog. This is her first review for an adult product and I think she did a great job! Thanks Laura, and Thanks Vibrator.com for sponsoring this review! ~ Missy


I was recently given the opportunity to review a product from Vibrator.com. I am always looking for new ways and new sex toys to help spice up my marriage. Doggie Style is one of our most favorite positions, so when I checked out the Toys for Couples, I immediately knew what I wanted to try! I chose the Sportsheets I Like It Doggie Style Enhancing Strap to review and yes I like it doggie style!


My package arrived very fast and it was very discrete. The actual package of the “I like it Doggie Style Strap” was very easy to open, I was able to open the package without any scissors. My “I like it Doggie Style Strap” is black in color and made with soft and padded nylon. The strap has a 4 in. by 14.5 in. pad with two16 in. adjustable nylon extensions. The two adjustable nylon extensions remind me of a type of backpack strap.

To give my “I like it Doggie Style Strap” a try I decided to make a date night with my husband. I sent the kids to my parents house and planned a nice romantic evening at home with my husband. We have never used any type of positioning strap before so we both were new to the whole idea. My husband is 6’2 and 250lbs which is a lot larger than me; I’m 5’2” and 130lbs, and sometime certain positions can be a little harder for us to figure out. Using the strap made it very easy for my husband to penetrate deeper and he was able to reach my spot a lot easier and a lot faster than before. I honestly loved it!! I have wide hips so I was kind of skeptical about how comfortable the strap would actually be. My husband place the pad part of the strap around my pelvis area and my he was able to use the straps to pull me closer to him. It was very soft and comfortable on my skin, it left no marks or redness. Normally my husband can get a little rough holding my thighs and hips, so having straps for him to hold onto is a plus for me. Also with the strap I noticed we were able to stay more in-sync, and I did notice he was in more control. The strap gave him more leverage and allowed him to constantly hit my G-spot. My husband said that is was very easy for him to hold the straps and they were comfortable to hold onto. Another thing that I love is that the “I like it Doggie Style Strap” is not only for Doggie Style, it can also be used with the missionary position. I was able to place the strap around the lower back area of my husband and use the strap to pull him closer to me for a deeper sensation. I love having the control of how deep and how fast I want him to penetrate inside me. I am sure that we will make great use of this strap in the near future by adding some new fun to our favorite positions.

The Sportsheets “I like it Doggie Style Strap” did not come with any cleaning instructions on or in the package, but after a little research online I found that the strap can be washed on a gentle cycle in sudsy water, and placed in the dryer on low temperature or delicate. You can store the strap just about anywhere, because it folds up and is very lightweight.

Our experience using the “I like it Doggie Style Strap” was great and I would recommend this to anyone wanting to add a new twist to an old favorite!


Laura


Posted in , , , , , , by Unknown

Friday, October 8, 2010

ClassiX Silicone Snatch  

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I had originally been interested in this item because my husband wanted something he could use without the maintenance required with materials like cyberskin. First off, the Silicone Snatch by ClassiX is not really silicone. I suppose for the low price I should have guessed that, I am told it is a "silicone blend". It is soft and squishy and does have an odor that reminded me of cyberskin, but I believe it is TPE. For our purposes it did not matter to me that it was not pure silicone, TPE is still Hypoallergenic, Phthalate and latex free. I have several other toys made with this material and I personally have nothing against it.

When examining the Silicone Snatch I noticed right away how small the entry hole was. At first I thought it was sealed as though it was supposed to feel like a virgin but with some lube I was able to get a finger in and see that I was wrong. When it is new the hole is so small you can't even see it! The inside is lined with ridges along the entire length which are around 1/4" apart. The toy is only about 3.5" long long with a girth of about 1.5". It is stretchy enough that it should be able to accommodate any size of penis but those on the larger side may want to find something else, read on to see why.

With plenty of water based lube we still struggled to get this snatch on my husbands penis. There was no way he was going to penetrate that thing just by pushing it down onto his shaft. He ended up having to pull the hole open with his fingers to maneuver it on while I held his penis upright. I can't see how someone could do this solo as it took us a few tries to get it using both of our hands. Once it was on, and both of our hands were lubed up we had to be careful not to let go. If you are only using it so that you can sling shot it across the room then by all means, let go! Otherwise, keep your grip as tight as possible - Not always easy with lube.

He said it did feel good, but complained that because of the short length he could only use it to stimulate either his shaft or his head; but not both. It was a good length to allow me to suck on his head, but was less stimulating on just the shaft. The box claims that it is perfect for beginners, which it may very well be due to the price, but the experience could be discouraging to a beginner if it doesn't work out as they hoped.

When we were done playing my husband commented that one of our buddies might be able to appreciate this toy more, but I took a look at it and saw that the entry hole that was once so tiny was now torn. This being after it's first use I really can't recommend this product to anyone unless you are just looking for something to give as a gag gift or a compact addition to your jack off session that won't leave you feeling like you broke the bank when you toss it.

The Silicone Snatch is a Pipedream Products Exclusive, but they also carry quite a few other masturbators & pumps if you don't think this one would be right for you. If you do decide on the Silicone Snatch, you should clean it with soap & water or toy cleaner before and after each use but avoid sharing with those you aren't fluid bonded with as TPE is slightly porous.

Posted in , , by Unknown

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Keep it Clean Foaming Toy Wash {Review}  

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PinkCherry Sex Toys

Since I recently got a new storage system for my toys, I thought it would also be a great time to give them all a good cleaning. I rarely share my toys and don't have a dishwasher. Boiling or bleaching works great, but I usually don't bother unless it is absolutely necessary. Having a quick and easy way to clean my toys for the past few weeks has been perfect for a lazy busy sex toy addict like me!

The process is pretty straight forward, spray some foam onto a cloth and wipe the surface of your toy (I spray it right onto the toy). Rinse your toy off in water, being careful not to get the battery compartment wet if it is not a waterproof toy. Wet Keep it Clean Foaming Toy Wash is the only foaming antibacterial toy cleaner and it is Alcohol, Oil, Silicone, and Cocamidopropyl Betaine Free. It doesn't irritate the skin or leave any greasy residues behind. Please make sure the material of your toy is compatible with toy cleaner before using.

I normally clean my toys at the sink, but for the purposes of being able to take photos without having to clean my counters under better lighting, I decided to use containers at the table. I suppose I could have skipped the soapy bath since it only added an extra step, but they all needed a good cleaning anyway.

--->
--->

Now, you might be wondering how this is any different from regular foaming Anti-Bacterial hand soap or sanitizer. Without having any hand sanitizer to compare ingredients, I am going to say that essentially it isn't any different but I will tell you why it is a great product to have...especially if you have a house full of kids like I do. I can hardly keep the kids away from the bubbles in the sink when I am doing dishes, what do you think they did the last time I had foaming hand cleaner? They think it is fun, use an insane amount of it each day, and before I know what's happened - it's all gone. It's great that they were keeping their hands clean, but doesn't help me when I want to use it. The best part about having a cleaner dedicated to my toys is that they won't touch it!

I left it on the bathroom counter, and when my son saw it he knew right away what it was for and wanted nothing to do with it and made sure to spread the word to the other kids too. So it's mine, all mine! You can get your own 7.5oz bottle from PinkCherry.ca or PinkCherry.com (and sex toys too!)

All clean!

Posted in , , , , by Unknown

Monday, October 4, 2010

Oh Ella, the things you do for me... {Review}  

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There are certain things that you really don't know what you are missing out on when you don't have them. How could you know? It's nice to base your purchases off reviews, but sometimes even the reviews don't totally convince us if we already think that we won't like something. I'm sure many of you have already read your share of rave reviews on toys from the Lelo line up. Some of you probably already own one, but if you do, you already know what the others are missing out on.


I am looking for those of you who have perhaps decided against purchasing a new Lelo toy, even after reading the positive reviews. Maybe you based your choice off the size or the shape, thinking that because it wasn't like what you currently own that you wouldn't enjoy it. For me that deciding factor was the firmness. I like squishy toys that can bend and conform to my body shape, and Ella's silicone is anything but squishy. I already knew that since I had seen it mentioned multiple times in reviews, but when she arrived I was in for a surprise.

Lelo Ella comes packaged in a sleeve like cardboard box, inside of which you will find a gorgeous black box which could easily pass as something that contains jewelery on your shelf. Protected under a molded sheet of plastic and nestled into another Ella lays safely inside, waiting to come out to play. You will also find a perfectly sized satin bag in the box, as well as directions on how to use your new dildo. I thought that was hilarious, yet considerate, although I don't know how many people shop around for a Dildo if they don't know what they are supposed to do with it.



Now, I'm going to tell you a little secret. As soon as I took my Rose colored Ella out of that gorgeous box and held her in my hand I immediately knew I was going to love her. So much so that before I even had a chance to play with her I ordered two more Lelo toys because with a silky soft texture like this, I knew there was no way they could let me down. I could happily stroke her against my skin all day, even the satin bag can't compete with how smooth her silicone feels.

Now on to her flexibility, and lack of it. If I didn't already know she was made out of 100% non-porous, Hypoallergenic, Phthalate & latex free silicone I may not have believed it. She is hard like plastic with no give at all when you squeeze her, though her contoured neck does flex and spring back when you apply pressure to it. She is 7.5" and 1.5" wide at her widest point.

Just thinking about how the smooth silicone was going to feel on my sensitive bits left me anxious to try her out as soon as I could. I guess you could say I have been in something of a rut and haven't been making the time to play with my toys as much as I normally do but having Ella in my hand changed all of that. Yes, I snuck off and played with her that day, and again the next day, and again the next. She definitely isn't one to patiently wait in the "to review" pile.



Her flattened G-Spot end is perfectly shaped to deliver intense G-Spot stimulation, while her smooth and seamless surface glides in and out with ease. Her gentle curves ensure nothing but comfort and pleasure to be had, no matter which end you use. Thats right, Ella is classified as dual ended, as her other end can be used as a traditional dildo.

Silicone is very easy to clean with some mild soap or toy cleaner & water. If you need to sterilize it between partners it can be bleached, boiled, or ran through the dishwasher without detergent. What I found exceptionally nice about Ella's silicone is that it is not a lint magnet like many other toys that I own. I have 5 pets in my house so drying a toy off with an actual towel after cleaning is something I tend to avoid but with Ella I was able to use the towel without finding my toy looking like a balding cat when I'm finished.

I suppose that's enough babble from me, but I'm curious...which toy or brand have you put off trying, despite having read multiple positive reviews? What's holding you back from trying something new?

PinkCherry Sex Toys

You can pick up your own Ella from PinkCherry.ca or PinkCherry.com for under $50! (Hint: Watch for my Pink Cherry GC Giveaway coming soon!)

Posted in , , , , by Unknown

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Fetish Fantasy Spread-Eagle Sling {Review}  

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I have been putting off posting this review while I worked out some kinks I had in using this product. I did eventually get it to work after watching Kevin's video (below) and a small modification. This was actually supposed to be included in my bondage week reviews, little late for that though... I received this and a few other fun things from Pipedream Products to review so keep an eye out for more reviews coming up!

The Fetish Fantasy Series Spread Eagle Sling is absolutely perfect, in theory. The spread eagle position allows for deep penetration and feels great, but it isn't always easy to hold that position for as long as you would like. Like other Fetish Fantasy series products, it comes with a free mask. The box calls it a satin mask, it is soft and comfortable - but it's definitely not satin.

The sling is made up of two nylon straps, with plastic buckles and a nearly 8" long neoprene neck support plus two ankle cuffs. The neck support resembles the padding you would find on a duffle bag and really doesn't offer very much for comfort, but it is better than nothing. The cuffs are made out of the same material as the neck pad and are just under 14" long in total, 8" without counting the Velcro. I didn't measure the straps, but they are long enough that I am pretty sure that there wouldn't be a problem using them no matter what your height (I'm 5ft).

While I was waiting for this sling, I read a couple reviews on it and was looking forward to trying it out. The very night it arrived I strapped the cuffs around my ankles while still fully dressed so I could adjust the length of the straps and have everything just right for when we wanted to use it. I noticed right away that the buckles didn't lock into place on their own and it is absolutely neccessary to hold onto the "tails" that hung from my feet to keep them from coming loose.

That alone wouldn't have been so much of a problem, but the third buckle that stays up near my neck was what caused a nuissance. The strap just slips when I put the least amount of resistance onto it which really defeats the purpose. The only way I could stop it from slipping was to tie a knot so it will stay put. But really? This shouldn't be necessary and the other reviews I read didn't appear to have this problem.

After I tied the knot, using the sling did turn out to be pretty fun. Leaving me spread and exposed for my husband to do as he wished with a few toys from my collection, and of course for intercourse. I found that it is equally possible to hold both tails with just one hand so that I could have a free hand to help him out. My legs still got a bit tired from being held up for so long, but most of the work was on my arms. My neck did not feel strained or sore at all! I did find myself wishing that there were cuffs for my wrists, so I might want to try out the Fetish Fantasy Hogtie Rope next! Overall, the Spread Eagle sling still isn't a favorite item but not a dud either. The Position Master looks to be superior and is definitely on my wishlist as well.


I know this is supposed to be my review, but Kevin summed up the assembly better than I could have in this video so if you are considering buying this sling you should check it out! One mistake that I originally made was that I didn't thread the buckle through the neck strap like how he shows in the video. If you skip that step, you will end up with one very long side and one very short side!



Posted in , , , , , by Unknown

Friday, September 24, 2010

Good Vibes Tunnel of Love Masturbation Sleeve {Review}  

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It took me a while to convince my husband to use a stroker, and he liked the first one we got but he didn't like the maintenance that it required. He wanted a toy that could jack off with and then be able to clean and store it without any special instructions. I have been shopping around to see what was available in silicone and didn't find very many but then I noticed the Tunnel of Love Sleeve from Good Vibrations and quickly requested it for review.

The Tunnel of Love is pure silicone, so it is non-porous, hypoallergenic, phthalate & latex free and is available in 3 different colors - Vanilla, Caramel, and Coffee. Not only is it silicone, these sleeves also have realistic openings and are available as a Vulva or Anus. I would have preferred to review the Vulva version, but since it was sold out I was sent the Anus in a nice coffee color. It came in a blister pack, with an insert that said "Silicone Dildo" which gave me a little chuckle. After asking my husband if he wanted to play with his new dildo and then showing him what I was talking about to end his confusion I took it out of the package to check it out. I am honestly not sure why mine came with the wrong package insert. The package could be used for storage if you put it on top of other things - mine got crushed and I threw it away.

The sleeve is 6 3/4" long with the diameter of the tunnel portion being 2" and the molded anus area is 3" across. The opening un-stretched is 5/8" and the tunnel is open on both ends. The description on Good Vibes says it stretches to 2 1/2", I didn't have anything that big to test out with it but I was able to fit 4 fingers inside once it was lubed up. The seams on mine weren't very tidy and you can see where they cut it out of the mold at the back as well as another spot about an inch inside of the anal opening. The seams don't affect function at all and they can't be felt during use so it is simply a cosmetic thing that could be fixed if it really bothered you and you can't beat the current price of $20. I did ask Mae about the seams, and she said the ones that she looked at in the store were not like this so it might be an isolated thing but I wanted to show what mine looks like.


Many of the reviews left from customers on the product page stated that the Anus was too tight, so I was a little worried about that but it turned out to not be a problem after adding plenty of Water Based Lube (Silicone based lube may damage it, do not use!). From my point of view, putting it on his penis seemed to give quite a bit more resistance than the other masturbation toy we had tried so I was going slow, but my he showed me it was Ok and rammed in down the full length of his penis. Unfortunately it wasn't long before he asked me to use his other toy instead, as he was not enjoying the Tunnel of Love.

I asked him for more details on what it was like and won't share his exact words but he said that while it wasn't too tight, it was too firm. He also said that the ridges felt good, but it was hard to enjoy with it being so firm. Once it is warmed & lubed up it does feel softer, but understandably not as soft as something like cyberskin, and not soft enough for him. Sorry Good Vibes, this one didn't work for us.

The big bonus is that silicone is very easy to clean and care for. A quick wash with a mild soap & warm water or toy cleaner is all it needs for a basic cleaning, and can even be bleached, boiled, or put in the top rack of your dishwasher to sterilize if needed. Remember to only use water based lube, and avoid contact with other toy materials during storage and this very affordable masturbation sleeve can be shared and won't breakdown over time like other materials.


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Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Under the Bed Restraints  

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I can't say that we are heavy into bondage, but we have played with a few things over the years. Until recently we didn't own any of our own restraints other than some silk scarves that were re-purposed on my request, so I was excited to add the Under the Bed Restraints by Sportsheets to our small collection!


Getting it onto the bed was interesting, it probably would have been so much easier if I had someone willing to help me...but the husband sat by about a foot away while I struggled to get it straight under the mattress. Would have been a priceless photo if anyone had the camera! I basically lifted the mattress and crawled in between there, and then I got stuck. Hubs was too busy laughing at me and telling me if I hadn't been so impatient he would have helped with it later, so my kid ended up holding up the mattress so I could get out!

Now that you have had your own little laugh, I thought I should say that the set up would be very easy if you had someone holding up the mattress while you put it in place. You could also just shove it under the mattress and drag the strap around to the other side, I didn't want them to get twisted so I chose the most difficult route. The 60" nylon strap goes under your mattress, and is adjustable using plastic buckles to fit any size bed. The four straps that branch out are also 60" long, and can be adjusted to any length you like as well. Each strap has a ring at the end with a clip to attach the cuffs.

The cuffs are 15" long in total, and 10" long for just the cuff. They are 2" wide are made from a very soft fabric. They feel especially nice against the skin and have held up to all the pulling and struggling that I gave them. The buckles hold their position when pulled on, and you can remove the cuffs and attach any cuffs you like onto the tethers. The Velcro holds strong and they are big enough that they should fit ankles and wrists of many sizes.


We tried it out with the cuffs coming out from the sides of the bed first, it held up and worked out just fine but I often hold my hands above my head and grab on to the bar during sex so we moved them and shortened the straps a bit and it is much more natural for me to have them centered that way. The wrist cuffs either sit under the pillows or hang over the edge of the bed while not in use. We also tried having the ankle cuffs coming out from the sides of the bed, which worked out better for keeping my legs spread so we left them that way and stuff them under the mattress when we are done.

This set turned out to be perfect for us. Our bed is a futon, with a regular double mattress on top of the futon mattress. There are bars at the head and foot that could be used for another restraint set, if we wanted to, but we would have to remove and put them away every time we wanted to use them. The Under the Bed Restraints eliminate that need, as they stay completely out of sight just by sticking them under the mattress. This set is a must for anyone wanting to experiment with bondage or add to their collection!

I received this product for review from Adult Sex Toys: Over 8000 Sex Toys and Adult Toys to choose from. The opinions within this post are of my own and I was not influenced in any way. Please do your own research before purchasing products. Your opinions and results may differ.

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Saturday, August 21, 2010

I wish I was a Sexy Goth Vampire...  

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I suppose this costume isn't really a bondage plaything, but it matches really well and would be super sexy used along with the Heart 2 Heart set so I decided to include it with my bondage reviews. I was lucky enough to receive this costume from Sexual Fantasy Boutique to review. It took me a long time to narrow my choice down to just one costume, and I finally settled on the Sexy Goth Vampire which is made by Seven 'Till Midnight.


Sexual Fantasy Boutique does not only sell sexy costumes, they also have a large assortment of lingerie, novelties, and adult toys. They offer a lowest price guarantee, and promise that if you find a lower price they will beat it by 20%. I wanted to check this out and shopped around a bit and the prices I found on many of my wish list items were indeed priced lower than the other stores that I have seen them at, so is definitely worth checking out if you are trying to find a deal.



I was really impressed with the quality of the costume. Instead of a thin, flimsy material like other costumes I have checked out in the past this one is made out of a strong cotton like regular clothing. The tag labels it as 98.5% cotton and 1.5% spandex, to me it feels like canvas or a light denim and has very little stretch. It has a zipper on one side that runs from 4" from the bottom of the dress all the way up to the top. It has pretty good breast coverage, but not a lot of support. I have B-Cups and am going to have to say the Large will fit better on someone with C's, which seems to be pretty typical in "size large" items.

The collar is fastened on with Velcro, which at first led me to believe that it could be worn without using it, but with the collar removed you are left with two soft Velcro pieces that won't stick together. Without the collar the straps are also not long enough to function as a strap. You could probably modify the costume with a bit of fabric and Velcro quite easily though, if you wanted to wear it without the collar. This is what I plan to do personally, as the collar looks a little silly to me and seemed to want to fall down and lay flat on my back rather than stand up like in the photo. It has plastic ribbing inside that helps keep it's shape.

The arm warmers that you see in the picture are included as well! I don't have a whole lot I can say about them, but they seem to be made of a quality material and can be worn with other outfits that might need an extra touch. They fit pretty well on my arms, but might be too tight on people with bigger biceps as they are just about too tight on mine. The little bat that decorates the skirt is made out of a shiny vinyl, and is the only part of the costume that seems cheaply made to me. I will probably end up taking it off with a seam ripper and may even add a new applique of some sort. Unfortunately, the boots and pettiskirt are not included.

I wish I could have told you all about how well the Sexy Goth Vampire Costume fit me but, sadly, it didn't. As soon as it came in the mail I hurried off to try it on, and before I even had it fully over my shoulders I knew it was going to be too tight. I asked for a size Large, which is stated as 12-14 on the site and I will have to say it is true to size so make sure to take a good look at the size charts and recommendations. I can squeeze into some 14's if they are stretchy but I usually wear a 16 and this costume does not have a lot of stretch. I can get the costume on, but I can't do up the zipper. Looks like I can't be a Sexy Goth Vampire just yet, I do love it though, and wish I could wear it as a dress so will have to use it as motivation to lose a few inches instead!

I was pretty bummed to not fit into the large, thankfully Sexual Fantasy Boutique sells plus size costumes and lingerie for those of us who need them too!

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Thursday, August 19, 2010

Heart 2 Heart cuffs  

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The first thing that I noticed about the Heart 2 Heart cuffs is that while they are still made of the same high quality leather as the whip, collar, and the blind fold, they are lacking the cute hearts. I still find them to be sexy with the solid red against black, it also makes them a little more gender neutral in my opinion.

They are 2 3/8" wide, which is only a tiny bit bigger than other cuffs that I own, but since these are leather and not very flexible they seem a bit big on my wrists. The cuffs fasten with a metal buckle and have 7 holes, half an inch apart. They should be able to comfortably fit on wrists from 5"-8" around. My wrists are 6" around and on the third smallest hole they are still a little loose on me, but not loose enough for me to escape.

Each cuff has an attached D ring so that you can easily add a cuff connector or bondage rope to secure their wearer however you please. There are 10 studs holding the two pieces of leather securely together, 8 of these show through on the side that touches your skin but they are not noticeable. The inside of the cuff is not lined but the leather is nice and smooth so it is still comfortable on the skin, although the D ring does make a small protrusion in the leather which could hurt if the cuffs are too tight.



Whether if you are a beginner or more advanced with bondage play, or if you just want to complete an outfit, the Heart 2 Heart cuffs would be a nice addition to any collection. Yes, I said complete an outfit! One of the things that I like the most about these cuffs is that I can wear them out, or even just around the house, and they look good. My husband likes this too, because he can randomly grab me and cuff me to something without taking the time to fasten the buckles!

Now, even though I enjoyed wearing them around I actually found that I prefer the softer Velcro fastening cuffs for rougher play time. Since we are new to restraints, the leather may just be something that I need to get used to. They didn't hurt my wrists, but they still aren't as comfortable as the others.

We haven't been overly rough with them, and they have not shown any wear. I'm sure they would stand up to a lot more than what we have out them through! They can be cleaned with a damp cloth and wiped dry if they happen to get dirty. If you would like your own paid of sexy cuffs you can pick them up at Babeland!

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